We Thought You Were Dead Oh Brother Where Art Thou

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Pomade Vendor: I tin get the part from Bristol. Information technology'll take two weeks, hither'south your pomade.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Two weeks? That don't do me no adept.

Pomade Vendor: Nearest Ford automobile man's Bristol.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Concord on, I don't desire this pomade. I desire Dapper Dan.

Pomade Vendor: I don't carry Dapper Dan, I carry Fop.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Well, I don't want Fop, goddamn it! I'thousand a Dapper Dan man!

Pomade Vendor: Watch your language, young feller, this is a public market. Now if y'all want Dapper Dan, I can order it for y'all, have it in a couple of weeks.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Well, own't this place a geographical oddity. Two weeks from everywhere!

Pete: Expect a minute. Who elected y'all leader of this outfit?

Ulysses Everett McGill: Well Pete, I figured it should be the one with the capacity for abstruse thought. Simply if that ain't the consensus view, then hell, permit'south put information technology to a vote.

Pete: Suits me. I'm voting for yours truly.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Well I'm voting for yours truly besides.

[Everett and Pete look at Delmar for the deciding vote]

Delmar O'Donnell: Okay... I'm with you fellas.

Tommy Johnson: I had to be up at that in that location crossroads last midnight, to sell my soul to the devil.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Well, ain't it a small earth, spiritually speaking. Pete and Delmar just been baptized and saved. I judge I'yard the only i that remains unaffiliated.

[after the *Iv* soggy bottom boys cease recording "I Am a Human being of Constant Sorrow"]

Ulysses Everett McGill: Woo! Hot Damn, son I believe yous did sell your soul to the devil.

Lund: Woooooooo-wee. Boy, that was a miiiighty fine a-pickin' and a-singin'. I'll tell you what, you come on in here and sign these papers here and I'm a gonna you ten dollars a piece.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Uh, okay sir. But Murt and Aloysius will have to sign Xes every bit simply iv of the states tin can write.

[offset lines]

Ulysses Everett McGill: Say, any of you boys smithies? Or, if not smithies per se, were y'all otherwise trained in the metallurgic arts before straitened circumstances forced you into a life of aimless wanderin'?

Blind Seer: You seek a great fortune, you iii who are now in bondage. You will observe a fortune, though it volition not be the one y'all seek. Simply first... kickoff you must travel a long and difficult road, a road fraught with peril. Mm-hmm. Y'all shall see thangs, wonderful to tell. Yous shall see a... a moo-cow... on the roof of a cotton house, ha. And, oh, and so many startlements. I cannot tell you how long this route shall be, but fear not the obstacles in your path, for fate has vouchsafed your advantage. Though the route may wind, yea, your hearts grow weary, still shall ye follow them, fifty-fifty unto your salvation.

Pappy O'Daniel: And furthermore, by way of endorsing my candidacy, the Soggy Bottom Boys are gonna lead united states of america all in a rousing chorus of "You Are My Sunshine."

[Applause. Pappy turns away from the mike, towards Everett]

Pappy O'Daniel: [no-nonsense] Own't you, boys?

Ulysses Everett McGill: Governor, it's one of our favorites.

Pappy O'Daniel: Son... you're gonna get in.

Pete: Well I'll be a sonofabitch. Delmar'south been saved.

Delmar O'Donnell: Well that'south it, boys. I've been redeemed. The preacher'southward washed warshed away all my sins and transgressions. It's the straight and narrow from here on out, and heaven everlasting's my reward.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Delmar, what are y'all talking nearly? We've got bigger fish to fry.

Delmar O'Donnell: The preacher says all my sins is warshed away, including that Piggly Wiggly I knocked over in Yazoo.

Ulysses Everett McGill: I thought you said you was innocent of those charges?

Delmar O'Donnell: Well I was lyin'. And the preacher says that that sin'southward been warshed abroad too. Neither God nor human's got nothin' on me now. C'monday in boys, the water is fine.

Delmar O'Donnell: Care for some gopher?

Ulysses Everett McGill: No thanks, Delmar. A third of a gopher would but agitate my appetite without beddin' 'er dorsum downward.

Delmar O'Donnell: Oh, yous can have the whole thing. Me and Pete already had one apiece. We ran beyond a whole... gopher hamlet.

Pete: I've e'er wondered, what'due south the devil look like?

Ulysses Everett McGill: Well, at that place are all manner of lesser imps and demons, Pete, but the great Satan hisself is red and scaly with a bifurcated tail, and he carries a hay fork.

Tommy Johnson: Oh, no. No, sir. He's white, equally white as you folks, with empty eyes and a big hollow phonation. He likes to travel around with a mean old hound. That's right.

Pete: The Preacher said it absolved us.

Ulysses Everett McGill: For him, not for the law. I'm surprised at you, Pete, I gave you lot credit for more brains than Delmar.

Delmar O'Donnell: But they was witnesses that seen us redeemed.

Ulysses Everett McGill: That's not the effect Delmar. Even if that did put you lot square with the Lord, the State of Mississippi's a little more hard-nosed.

[laughs]

Ulysses Everett McGill: Baptism! You lot two are simply dumber than a bag of hammers!

Ulysses Everett McGill: Yous can't display a toad in a fine eating place like this! Why, the good folks here would become right off the feed!

Delmar O'Donnell: I simply don't recall information technology's right keeping him under wraps like we's ashamed of him.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Well, if it is Pete, I am ashamed of him! Way I meet it, he got what he deserved, fornicating with some whore of Babylon. These things don't happen for no reason, Delmar. It'south patently some kinda judgment on his character.

Delmar O'Donnell: Well, the ii of u.s.a. was fixin' to fornicate!

Pappy O'Daniel: Sounded to me like he was harboring a mean grudge against the Soggy Bottom Boys on account of their crude and rowdy past. Looks like Homer Stokes is the kind of fellow who wants to cast the first stone.

[boos]

Pappy O'Daniel: Well, I'm with you folks. I'm a forgive-and-forgettin' Christian, and I say, if their rambunctiousness, and misdemeanoring, is behind them...

[turns away from the mike, towards Everett]

Pappy O'Daniel: [no-nonsense] Information technology is, ain't it, boys?

Ulysses Everett McGill: Uh, yes sir, it is.

Ulysses Everett McGill: The treasure is withal in that location boys, believe me.

Delmar O'Donnell: Only how'd he know most the treasure?

Ulysses Everett McGill: I don't know Delmar. The blind are reputed to possess sensitivities compensating for their lack of sight, fifty-fifty to the indicate of developing paranormal psychic powers. Now, conspicuously seeing into the time to come would fall into neatly into that category; its not and so surprising then that an organism deprived of its earthly vision...

Pete: He said we wouldn't become get it. He said we wouldn't get the treasure we seek on account of our ob-stac-les.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Well what the hell does he know, he's but an ignorant old human?

Lund: Now, what can I do y'all for Mr. French?

French: How tin I lay a hold of them Soggy Bottom Boys?

Lund: Soggy Bottom? I don't precisely think them.

French: They cut a tape in here a few days ago, was an old-timey harmony matter with a guitar accom... accomp...

Lund: Oh here, here, here, I call back them! They was colored fellas, I believe.

French: Uh huh.

Lund: Yessuh, they're a fine bunch a boys. They sang in the yonder can and skeedadled.

French: Well that tape is goin' through the goddamned roof. They playin' it as far away equally Mobile.

Lund: Naw?

French: Whole damn state's goin' apey.

Lund: Well it was a powerful air.

French: Hot damn, we gotta find them boys and sign 'em to a big fat contract. Hells Bells, Mr. Lund, if we don't the goddamned competition will.

Lund: Ohhhh mercy! Yes nosotros got to beat that contest.

George Nelson: [after Nelson has robbed the depository financial institution] Thank you folks! And remember, Jesus saves, simply George Nelson withdraws!

[laughs]

George Nelson: Go fetch the auto voiture, Pete.

Adult female In Bank: [whispering] Is that "Babyface" Nelson?

George Nelson: Who said that?

[pause]

George Nelson: What ignorant, low down, slanderizin, son of a bowwow said that?

[goes up to woman]

George Nelson: My proper noun is George Nelson, get me?

Delmar O'Donnell: She didn't mean nothin past information technology, George.

George Nelson: [noticeably upset] George Nelson! Not "Babyface"! You think, and you tell your friends! I'k George Nelson! Born to raise hell!

[Nelson points his Tommy Gun towards the ceiling and fires information technology, and the bank patrons jump]

[singing]

Ulysses Everett McGill: I am a man of abiding sorrow, I've seen trouble all my days. I bid farewell to old Kentucky, the identify where I was born and raised.

Delmar O'Donnell,Pete: The identify where he was born and raised.

Ulysses Everett McGill: For six long years I've been in trouble, no pleasure hither on Earth I've found. For in this world I'm spring to ramble, I have no friends to assist me out.

Delmar O'Donnell,Pete: He has no friends to assistance him out.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Maybe your friends think I'm just a stranger, my face you never volition see no more. Simply there is one promise that is given, I'll meet you on God's gilded shore.

Delmar O'Donnell,Pete: He'll meet you on God'due south gilt shore.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Me an' the old lady are gonna pick upward the pieces and retie the knot, mixaphorically speaking.

Delmar O'Donnell: I'm gonna visit those foreclosing son-of-a-guns at the Indianola Savings & Loan, slap that money on the barrelhead and purchase back the family farm. You ain't no kind of man if yous own't got land.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Pete'southward cousin turned us in for the bounty.

Pete: The hell you say! Wash is kin!

Washington Hogwallop: Sorry, Pete, I know we're kin, but they got this depression on. I got to practise for me and mine.

Pete: I'm gonna impale you, Judas Iscariot Hogwallop!

Pete: Well hell, it ain't square one! Own't nobody gonna selection upwardly three filthy, unshaved hitch-hikers, and one of them a know-it-all that tin can't keep his trap close.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Pete, the personal rancor reflected in that remark I don't intend to dignify with comment. But I would like to address your general attitude of hopeless negativism. Consider the lilies of the goddamn field or... hell! Take at look at Delmar hither as your paradigm of promise.

Delmar O'Donnell: Yeah, look at me.

[Discussing how to counter Homer Stokes' campaign for governor]

Junior O'Daniel: Nosotros could hire our own midget, even shorter than his.

Pappy O'Daniel: Wouldn't we look like a bunch of Johnny-come-latelies, bragging on our own midget, doesn't matter how stumpy.

Pappy O'Daniel: Milk shake a leg Junior! Thank God your mammy died givin' birth. If she'd have seen you, she'd take died o' shame.

Homer Stokes: [as Thou Kleagle at a KKK rally] Brothers! Oh, brothers! We have all gathered here, to preserve our hallowed culture and heritage! We aim to pull evil upwardly by the root, before information technology chokes out the blossom of our culture and heritage! And our women, allow's not forget those ladies, y'all. Looking to us for protection! From darkies, from Jews, from papists, and from all those smart-donkey folks say nosotros come descended from monkeys!

Ulysses Everett McGill: Deceitful, ii-faced she-adult female. Never trust a female Delmar, remember that i simple precept and your time with me will not accept been ill spent.

Delmar O'Donnell: Ok, Everett.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Striking by a train! Truth ways nothing to a woman, Delmar. Triumph of the subjective. You ever been with a adult female?

Delmar O'Donnell: Well, I... I... I gotta get the family farm back before I tin can outset thinking nigh that.

Ulysses Everett McGill: That'south correct, if and then. Believe me Delmar, woman is the most fiendish musical instrument of torture e'er devised to bedevil the days of man.

Penny Wharvey McGill: Vernon here's got a job. Vernon'due south got prospects. He's bona fide. What are you?

Pete: Do not seek the treasure!

Big Dan Teague: You don't say much my friend, but when yous do it's to the indicate, and I salute y'all for it.

Pappy O'Daniel: I'll press your flesh, yous dimwitted sumbitch! You don't tell your pappy how to court the electorate. We own't 1-at-a-timin' here. We're MASS communicating!

Ulysses Everett McGill: Well, every bit soon equally we go ourselves cleaned up and we get a footling smellum in our hair, why, we're gonna feel 100% better almost ourselves and almost life in general.

Pete: Crazy! No one's ever gonna believe we're a real band.

Ulysses Everett McGill: No, it'due south gonna work. I just gotta become close enough to talk to her. Takin' off with us has got more future than marryin' a guy named Waldrip. I'm Goddamned bona fide!

Delmar O'Donnell: Everett, my beard itches.

Ulysses Everett McGill: Why are you telling our gals that I was hit by a train?

Penny Wharvey McGill: Lots of respectable people take been hit by trains. Approximate Hobbie over in Cookville was hit by a train. What was I gonna tell them, that you got sent to the penal farm and I divorced yous from shame?

Ulysses Everett McGill: Uh, I take your indicate. But information technology does put me in a damn awkward position, vis-a-vis my progeny.

Siren,Siren,Siren: [singing] Go to sleep you little baby / Go to slumber y'all little baby / You and me and the devil makes three / Don't demand no other lovin' infant // Go to slumber you piffling baby / Go to slumber you little baby / Come and lay your bones on the alabaster stones / And exist my ever lovin' baby // Go to sleep you lilliputian baby / Go to sleep yous little baby / Your momma'due south gone away and your daddy'due south gone to stay / Didn't leave nobody simply the infant // Go to sleep you little baby / Become to sleep you lot little baby / Everybody'due south gone in the cotton and the corn / Didn't leave nobody but the baby // You're a sweet lilliputian baby / You're a sweetness little baby / Honey in the rock and the sugar don't cease / Gonna bring a bottle to the babe // Don't you cry pretty babe / Don't yous weep pretty baby / She's long gone with the red shoes on / Gonna run into another lovin' baby // Go to sleep yous little baby / Get to sleep you piddling babe / You lot and me and the devil makes three / Don't demand no other lovin' babe // Get to slumber you picayune infant / Go to slumber yous little baby / You and me and the devil makes iii / Don't demand no other lovin' baby // Go to sleep you piddling infant / Go to sleep y'all footling baby / Your momma'southward gone abroad and your daddy'southward gone to stay / Didn't leave nobody just the infant // Become to sleep you lilliputian baby / Go to sleep you little babe / Come and lay your bones on the alabaster stones / And be my always lovin' baby

Delmar O'Donnell: Them syreens did this to Pete. They loved him up and turned him into a horny toad.

Homer Stokes: These boys is not white! These boys is non white! Hell, they ain't even old timey!

Ulysses Everett McGill: Well, I guess hard times flush the chump. Everybody's lookin' for answers... Where the hell's he goin'?

[as Delmar runs out to be baptized]

Pete: Well, I'll be a son of a bitch. Delmar's been saved!

Homo with Bullhorn: All right, boys! It's the regime! Nosotros got you surrounded! Just come on out and grabbin' air! And don't endeavour nothing fancy! Your sityeachin is purty nearly hopeless!

[every bit a noose is flung over Pete]

Sheriff Cooley: Stairway to heaven. We shall all meet past and past.

Ulysses Everett McGill: So yous're against me now besides? Is that how it is boys? The whole world, God almighty, and now you.

Delmar O'Donnell: Jacking up banks. I tin see how a fella'd derive a whole lot of pleasure and satisfaction out of information technology.

Big Dan Teague: Give thanks you for the conversational hiatus. I generally refrain from voice communication durin' gustation. I find it form and vulgar. Where were we?

Delmar O'Donnell: Makin' coin in the service of the Lord.

Big Dan Teague: Heh, you don't say much, friend, but when you do, it's to the point and I salute you for it!

Ulysses Everett McGill: I am the only daddy you got! I'm the damn paterfamilias!

Wharvey Gal: But y'all ain't bona fide!

Big Dan Teague: Thank you boys for throwin' in that fricassee. I'm a human being of large appetite, and even with lunch under my chugalug, I was feelin' a mite peckish.

Ulysses Everett McGill: It's our pleasance, Large Dan.

Pappy O'Daniel: Moral fibre? I invented moral fibre! Pappy O'Daniel was displaying rectitude and high-mindedness when that egghead you work for was nonetheless messing his drawers!

Pappy O'Daniel: Furthermore, in the second Pappy O'Daniel administration, these boys is gonna be my *brain* trust.

Delmar O'Donnell: What's that mean, Everett?

Homer Stokes: And I say to you that the great country a Mississippi cannot beget four more years a Pappy O'Daniel - 4 more years a cronyism, nepotism, racialism and service to the Innarests! The choice, she'due south a clear 'united nations: Pappy O'Daniel, slave a the Innarests; Homer Stokes, servant a the piffling human being! Ain't that right, little fella?

The Piffling Man: He ain't lyin'!

Ulysses Everett McGill: Yessir, the South is gonna alter. Everything'due south gonna be put on electricity and run on a paying footing. Out with old spiritual mumbo-colossal, the superstition and the backward ways. We're gonna see a brave new world where they run anybody a wire and hook us all up to the grid. Yessir, a veritable age of reason - like they had in France. And not a moment besides before long...

Soggy Bottom Customer: Practice you have the Soggy Bottom Boys performing "Man of Abiding Sorrow"?

Record Shop Clerk: No ma'am. Nosotros got a new shipment in yesterday. Sorry, just we just can't go along 'em on our shelves.

Pete: Since we been followin' your lead, nosotros own't got zero only trouble.

Pete: My pa e'er said "Never trust a Hogwallop!"

Ulysses Everett McGill: The quondam tactician has got a plan. For the transportation that is, I don't know how I'm gonna keep my coiffure in society.

Pete: How's this a plan? How we gonna go a motorcar?

Ulysses Everett McGill: Sell that. I figure it tin just have painful association for Wash.

Pete: [reading] "To Washington Bartholomew Hogwallop, from his loving Cora. Amor Fidel... is."

Ulysses Everett McGill: It was in his bureau. I figure it'll fetch us enough greenbacks for a proficient used machine-voiture, and a little left over besides.

Delmar O'Donnell: Hey mister! I don't mean to be tellin' tales out of school, but there's a feller in there that'll pay you 10 dollars if you sing into his can.

Large Dan Teague: Bible sales. Now the trade is not a complicated one. There are but two things to learn. One bein' where to find a wholesaler - the Word of God in bulk as information technology were. Two, how to recognize your customer. Who are yous dealin' with? Information technology's an practice in psychology, so to speak.

Homer Stokes: This ring of miscreants, this very evening, interfered with a lynch mob in the performance of its duty.

[Concluding Lines]

Blind Seer: [sings] Oh, comport me abroad on your snow white wings to my celestial dwelling

Woolworths Customer: Who is that human?

Penny Wharvey McGill: He's not my husband... Just a drifter, I guess... Just some no-account out-of-stater.

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